Saturday, May 07, 2005
If You Lived Here, You'd Be Home Now
PHONE: Ring, ring.
CJB: Pulpfiction Books.
LONG DISTANCE CALLER: I'm calling about a book on your website.
CJB: Yes, which one is that?
LDC: [Monograph] by [artist name]. How much is it to ship to New York City, overnight?
CJB: Probably a lot. Let me find the book, weigh it, and call you back. What's your phone number?
LDC: 212-555-1234. But I need to know right now!
CJB: We have 3000-odd books online. I don't know where this one is, nor how much it weighs. Let me find it and call you back.
LDC: That's not good enough!
CJB (patience evaporating): Look, if you're desperate enough to be ordering this from me and not some sharpie New York dealer, a ten-minute wait isn't going to kill you.
LDC: With an attitude like that, you should be selling books here!
CJB: I wish I was, believe me.
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